He Isn't Chapter 14

Quick note before you read this lovely chapter! This is technically the end of the story, but there's another small chunk I will be posting later on. Thank you all so much for your dedicated reading and I hope to be writing more in the future! <3 Happy trails~ <3

---

Miyagi could hear voices, but they seemed very far away, like his ears were filled with water. He could neither recognize the owner of the voices or where they were coming from, so he sat in the darkness. There was a sharp pain in his head, tracing from behind his right eye to the back of his neck. Something had dripped down the side of his face and was becoming dried and crusted.

"Where...?" His surroundings took a full minute before coming into focus, that is, after the man had finally gotten up the courage to open his eyes.

"My porch light came loose and fell on your head." Risako entered the room, a wary look on her pale face. Her eyes were red, as if she had been crying. Clutched tightly in her hands was a large bowl of steaming water, a cloth draped over the side. "Let me clean you up some. Alright?"

"Where is Shinobu?" In a rush, the memory of the boy came back to Miyagi. He sat up, apparently laying on Risako's couch, his body swaying dangerously. A firm hand caught him the shoulder, laying him back down.

"Lay still." This voice belonged to Miyagi's boss, as well as Risako and Shinobu's father. Alarmed, the dark-haired man turned to look up at his superior, his heart beginning to race.

Why is he here?! A million horrible images began to fly through Miyagi's head. Him losing his job. Him being arrested. Or worst of all, though perhaps borderline dramatic, Shinobu and him being forced to break-up.

"I'll get you some water." The gray-haired man left the room, somewhat to Miyagi's relief, except now he was with Risako.

"You don't have to give me such a cold look." She knelt in front of him, one of her small hands dipping the cloth into the bowl of hot water. She rang out the excess and began to dab at the crust, presumably blood, on Miyagi's face. "I didn't invite him over here. He found out about Shinobu and showed up."

"Makes me wonder what would have happened if he hadn't of shown up." The professor was in a fowl mood, half because of the pain in his head and half because he still hadn't been able to see Shinobu. "How is he doing? Shinobu."

"His fever's gone down. He just needs to sleep it off."

"Thank you for going to get him."

"Why wouldn't I? He is my brother." Though she had spoken in a soft tone, there was a bitterness to Risako's words that hadn't been there before.

"Is there any chance that we'll be able to talk alone?" The dark-haired man asked, lowering his voice instinctively, his boss' footsteps approaching.

"I'll see to it that we get some privacy." Risako's voice had lost it's bitterness and was now high and light, feigning politeness. Miyagi couldn't help but feel slightly annoyed. He hated having to play along with Risako, especially when he was so angry at her, but he didn't want to make a big show in front of the head of his department.

Just a little longer. He reminded himself, shutting his eyes tight to fight off a wave of nausea. "How did your porch light just happen to smash on my head?"

"It's been loose for some time now, it was only a matter of time before it fell. You were banging on the door so roughly you shook it off the wall."

"I guess I'm having a streak of bad luck."

"I guess you are." Risako sighed heavily, as if she was bored with their conversation. The sound of water rang in Miyagi's ears as she rinsed out the cloth she was using before going at his head once more with it. "It doesn't look like any glass lodged itself in your skin. You probably don't need stitches either, it's just a small cut."

"Not so unlucky after all, right?" Trying to lighten to mood a little, the dean spoke in a cheerful tone, patting one of Miyagi's arms.

Maybe it was his imagination, but Miyagi could swear that his boss' hands were tense.

"I'm going to dump out this water." The literature professor opened his eyes in time to see Risako retreating to the kitchen, her heels clicking on the hard-wood floors. She returned only moments later, shaking some loose water from her hands. "Can I have a word with Yoh?"

"Yes! I'll go check on Shinobu." Sounding almost giddy, the dean disappeared up a flight of stairs, never glancing back.

Alright, now I know something's going on. He couldn't wait to get out of here. Miyagi was instantly on guard, unsure of what exactly Risako planned on talking to him about. He waited a moment or two before realizing that she was expecting him to begin. Fine, if she wants it that way-...   

"Tell me what's going on. I want to know everything, starting with why you turned off Shinobu's phone service. That wasn't yours to play around with." Miyagi grit his teeth, his anger exasperating the pain in his head. "Don't give me some bullshit story either."

"Alright, so I admit, I cut his cellphone service off. My plan wouldn't have worked though if he had been able to just call you up." Risako cast her eyes towards the floor. She spoke like a child who had just gotten something taken away. "He would have found out that it wasn't you who drove your car into the lake."

"Speaking of which, what was the motive behind that?"

"I'm getting to that." Looking annoyed at being interrupted, Risako gave Miyagi a scornful look before beginning to talk again. "I needed that car wreck to get into the paper, but I knew you wouldn't do it yourself. So me and my boyfriend took your car and took it for a little swim."

"Why did it need to be in the paper? Shinobu wouldn't have seen it anyways. Also, remind me to thank you later. I had a lot of old books in there when it went down."

"You're welcome." Brushing back some of her dark hair, Risako crossed her arms over her chest. "Shinobu wasn't here to see the article, so I took it to him. Couple that with the fact that you two hadn't spoken since he left, he jumped to the wrong conclusion, like I knew he would."

"Why?!" Miyagi demanded, pushing himself into a sitting position, and ultimately up off the couch. He took a step towards Risako, seizing one of her wrists in his hand. "He's your little brother! Not to mention the fact that he's done nothing to warrant all this!"

"Why...?! Why?! I'll tell you why! Day in and day out it's the same thing. 'Be more like your little brother.', 'Shinobu's such a good child.', 'You're so shameful Risako, why can't you be more like Shinobu?'. All I have to do is tell my parents what kind of relationship he's in with you and it'll all be over. I won't have to hear it anymore."

"But why go to all this trouble? Sleeping with me, stealing my car, cutting off my contact with Shinobu-... I guess maybe I deserved it, but he didn't. So what, you're jealous? Get over it, you're the adult here."

"Because I needed something to hang over your head." Voice ice cold, Risako wrenched her arm free of Miyagi's grip. "If you agree to get back together with me, I'll tell Shinobu the truth and I'll keep your relationship with him a secret."

"Look, I'm not anything special, why do you want me so damn bad?" The dark-haired man took a step back, giving her a long look. "I'm not worth all the effort, trust me."

"When I was with you, my parents were proud of me. Everything was perfect, but you wouldn't accept me. You wouldn't stop looking towards the past, searching for your teacher."

"They're not ashamed of you for divorcing me! They're upset because you sleep around. They want you to find someone and settle down. Bringing home a different guy every week doesn't exactly give you a good reputation."

"None of them are you. I need you for things to work right." A tired expression came over Risako and she leaned back against the nearest wall. Miyagi noticed for the first time how worn she looked, her hair unkempt, her clothes wrinkled, her make-up faded. "I need you Yoh."

"No, you don't." Miyagi spoke slowly, taking a few cautious steps towards her. When she didn't move he went over to her and pulled her into a hug. "I meant what I said the other day. You're better than this, so stop doing all this other stuff and focus on a goal or something. Something you can do that'll make your parents proud of you."

I have no clue what that might be, but as long as it doesn't involve my car-...

The brunette woman said nothing, but her arms slipped around to Miyagi's back, her fingers gripping at his shirt. Her head found it's way to one of his shoulders and remained there. Relived to see that she had finally come to her senses, he relaxed, waiting for her to get all her emotions out so they could move on.

It was then that Miyagi's eyes caught site of something glistening in the other room.

At first it looked like any old lamp, simply set out on the dining room table, however, something ominous told Miyagi to take a closer look. He pulled away from Risako's grip and walked into the opposite room, his pulse quickening. His head injury was playing tricks on him, because there was no way that there was blood on the base of the light.

"Risako... You don't have a porch lamp, do you?" Miyagi had thought it strange when she had mentioned the lamp falling on him, but he hadn't considered the fact that she didn't actually have a porch lamp, let alone one that could have fallen on him.

"Now Yoh, there's no need to get upset." She had come up behind him and her breath was now hot against the back of his neck. "It was an accident, you scared me, pounding on the door like that."

"Risako, you need to get some kind of help."

"Babe, you're all the help I need."

"I'm serious." Miyagi's mouth was suddenly dry and he couldn't will himself to move, though he knew he had to get away from her. "You've lost it."

"He found someone in Australia you know." Ignoring Miyagi's comment, Risako circled around him, her skinny fingers tracing affectionately over the silver shaft of the lamp. "A blond boy, named Colin. They're involved."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean just what I said. He went off to Australia and replaced you. Why else do you think he never called? He was too busy chasing those pretty beach-boys."

"He wouldn't do that." His voice sounded all wrong, weak almost. Shinobu wouldn't replace him, that was impossible. "He was either sulking or swamped with school-work."

"They slept together you know." Smiling to herself, Risako picked up the lamp in one hand and stepped towards Miyagi. "The Australian boy's ex-girlfriend told me all about it."

For a moment, Miyagi couldn't think about anything other than Risako's words. Surely she was wrong, Shinobu wouldn't just run off and replace him. Would he? The doubt lingered for a moment longer before he decided that her words were fallacy. Like being submerged in cold water, Miyagi's senses awoke.

"It doesn't matter what happened in Australia. At the time he and I weren't together, so if he found someone else during that time, it's tough luck for me." Nodding for effect, Miyagi was confident with his response, especially after seeing the look on Risako's face. She looked almost bewildered.

"You're okay with that...?"

"Yes and no." He paused for a moment, trying to think of how to phrase it. "I guess, if he was happy, then it would be alright. With Shinobu, that's really all I care about, I want him to be happy in life, with or without me."

"He cheated on you though!" As if Miyagi's words were incomprehensible, the dark-haired woman shook her head, eyes bulging a little. She stood for a long time, looking as if she had lost all sense and reasoning. Throwing caution to the wind, Miyagi took a step towards her.

"Risako, listen to me, alright? This is the lifestyle I choose. The person I choose. I'm sorry if you thought something else, but I won't get back together with you." Speaking in a calm, clear tone, he reached his hands carefully for the broken lamp in her hands. Her eyes flew to meet his gaze and she pulled the lamp back, swinging it through the air.

Miyagi didn't have time to dodge, so he threw his arms up to protect his face, bracing himself for the impact. Out of the corner of his eyes he caught something blur on the edge of his vision and when he turned to look he realized that the blur was Risako's current boyfriend.

"Risako, that's enough!" Looking as surprised as Miyagi felt, Tsuku was holding Risako back, one of his hands working to pry the lamp from her hands. "This has gone way to far! You have to let go of whatever issues you have with this man."

"Get off me." Risako hissed, giving Tsuku a vicious look. He didn't relent and finally pulled the light from her hands. He handed it over to Miyagi for safe keeping and pulled the struggling woman against his chest.

"What's going on...?" A fourth person had just entered the room and was looking at the scene with an incredulous expression. Miyagi's boss stepped towards his daughter, who was now trying less frantically to escape.

"It's Miyagi. He's having an inappropriate relationship with Shinobu." More bi-polar than ever, Risako was determined to keep up some kind of farce. "I thought maybe I could handle things on my own, but he tried to attack me."

"Not to be disrespectful, but you can't honestly believe the bullshit coming out of her mouth, can you?" Miyagi looked at Shinobu's father sternly, to which he got a blank expression in reply. "Ah-... Look, I can explain if you give me a chance."

"I'll explain." It was Tsuku talking this time, his eyes lit up with a fiery determination.

---

Somehow, they had all ended up seated in the living room again. Risako had spent all the energy she had on trying to bash Miyagi's head in with the lamp, so she was mostly sitting as an empty shell next to Tsuku. He was gripping her shoulders, just in case she got erratic again.

"I don't know the full story, but I know my part in it." He began, clearing his throat. "Risako and I met about a year ago at a bar. She had told me she was waiting for a friend, but he never showed up, so I offered to give her a ride home. Somehow or another she ended up at my house and spent the night on my couch."

"After that night, I guess it was just natural that we started to hang out. She would come see me and I would go see her. Eventually we decided to start dating and things were fine for a while. About two months into the relationship I noticed that she was sneaking off and making excuses. Naturally one of my first concerns was that she might have been cheating on me."

"To make a long story short, she was." Tsuku grimaced a little and Miyagi nodded solemnly, only able to imagine what the man across from him has gone through. "She and I broke up and I didn't see her for a long time. A month ago I ran into her at the library and offered to by her lunch so we could catch up."

"She told me about everything that had happened since our break-up. The guys, the fights with her mother, all of it. I guess I wanted so badly to help her out, to make her happy again, that I agreed to give her another chance."

"I think you went a little far." Miyagi couldn't help but grumble, still sour about his car being sunk in a lake. Tsuku looked at him apologetically and nodded.

"I'll pay for the damages if you would like. Get a bill from the repair shop and I'll give you a number so you can fax it to me." Though it was a sincere offer, Miyagi doubted even that would completely make him want to forgive the two of them.

"Go on. Finish your story."

"Risako and her mother had a really bad argument and she got really strange after that. Started talking about her ex-husband. I never would have thought she would have done all this. I helped her sink your car in the lake, but I was under the impression at the time that it was for revenge."

Miyagi narrowed his eyes at this bit of information and Tsuku scrambled to continue, looking suddenly nervous.

"N-Not that, that justifies anything."

"I don't understand." Finally Risako's father spoke, looking at his daughter sternly. "Why would you do all this? Risako...?"  

"I thought if I got back together with Miyagi then you and Mother wouldn't be so ashamed of me." Dabbing at her eyes some, Shinobu's sister scrubbed the tears off her face. "I guess I kind of got obsessed with the idea that I did some things that-..." She couldn't finish, her voice cracked and trailed off.

"Listen up and listen good. I'm going to only say it one more time. I'm not getting back together with you. I have someone I care about." Miyagi reached a hand out and set it on Risako's head, mussing up her hair. "You need to get some help."

"I don't know what to say," Looking about as worn down as Risako, the dean gave Miyagi a long look. "Risako's done so much damage to you. I'm so sorry about all of this."

"I'm not planning to press charges as long as you check her into a medical center where she can get the help she needs," As if reading Tsuku's mind, Miyagi went on to say, "and as long as you pay the repair bill I won't press charges against you either."

"Thank you." The younger man said earnestly, dipping his head.

"Now if we're all done here, I would like to go upstairs and check on Shinobu." Casting his eyes around the room, he saw no sign of protest. With a long sigh, Miyagi rose from the couch and finally was able to make his way up the stairs and to the guest room.

He paused outside the door, his whole body wracked with nerves. The last time he had seen Shinobu had been nearly three months earlier and they hadn't been on the best of terms. Despite knowing that the boy had rushed home to see him, Miyagi couldn't help but worry about some form of rejection.

Shaking his worried from his head, he turned the door handle and walked into the dark room.

---

Shinobu felt as if he had been sleeping for a long time, though he had no way of knowing how long. He wondered when the plane was going to land and hoped that it would be soon, he was dying to go meet up with Miyagi. However, the warm hand combing through his hair was making him feel drowsier and drowsier, making it that much harder to open his sleep filled eyes.

"G'off. Stop it." He swatted at the hand on his head, but it didn't stop. Opening his eyes so that he could better defend himself, Shinobu was bewildered to find that he wasn't on the plane, but resting in a bed. The room was dark, giving him no details with which to determine his location. He threw back his covers and sat up, a sharp pain jabbing the back of his eyes. "Where-...?!"

"You need to lay back down,"

This voice.

Though it was dark in the room, there was enough light from the crack in the door for Shinobu to make out the face of Miyagi. The older man was sitting on the edge of the bed, his expression unreadable. The boy's heart skipped and for a moment all he could do was gape and try to think of what to say in reply.

"Where am I?" It was all Shinobu could come up with and not what he had planned to say when he met back up with Miyagi. Then again, the whole situation was not what he had planned.

"You passed out and so your sister went to pick you up." Speaking almost in a tense tone, the professor stood up and began to feel around for the light switch. "Watch your eyes."

Blinded for a second, Shinobu's headache began to ache all the more, causing him to growl in frustration. The warm hand from earlier once more returned to combing through his hair. When his eyes had adjusted, Shinobu looked up at Miyagi, gasping in surprise.

The dark-haired man looked like he had been in some kind of a fight, sporting a large wound across the right side of his forehead, blood still caked in his hair and on some of his skin, which was beginning to bruise. His shirt was stained red as well, along with the tie that hung loosely from Miyagi's neck.

"What happened to you?" Shyly, the honey-haired boy reached out a hand and ran his fingers over the uninjured side of the man's face.

"It's a really long story that I'm really in no mood to tell." At Shinobu's touch a worn and exhausted look came across Miyagi's face and he leaned over so that he could rest his head against the smaller's chest. "Welcome home Shinobu."

Though he had promised himself he wouldn't cry, Shinobu's eyes began to fog with tears. His arms wrapped carefully around Miyagi's neck and locked into place there. He tilted his head back and closed his gray colored eyes, his breathing becoming a little unsteady.

Welcome home Shinobu.

"I'm glad to be back." He managed in reply, fumbling around for something with which to wipe his nose on. As if he had predicted Shinobu's reaction, Miyagi's had appeared with a small packet of pocket tissues. He took the tissues with a small laugh and pulled a few out, using them to stop the waterfall that was his nose.

"I missed you."

"I missed you too." Shinobu jumped a little, feeling warm arms creep around his waist, fingers brushing his back in a way that was almost embarrassing. "W-Wait a second Miyagi-..."

"Don't get ahead of yourself." Miyagi said, in a tone that was almost chiding. "You need to get rest, besides, I wouldn't do anything like that in your sister's home. Oh, I might want to mention, your father is downstairs also."

"He is...?"

"Him and Risako and Risako's dog-... Erm... I mean boyfriend thing."

"Can we go to your house?" Shinobu held his breath, waiting for Miyagi's reply. "I mean... Can we go home?" Miyagi pulled back from his chest and gave the boy a lop-sided smile.

"Yeah, we can go home." Miyagi helped Shinobu to his feet and the two of them had just started to make their way downstairs when suddenly the dean walked in. His lips were drawn into a thin line and his eyes went from the arm around Shinobu's waist to Miyagi's face and back again.

"Is what Risako said true?" Voice icy cold, Miyagi's boss took a step towards them. "What is your relationship with my son exactly...?"

---

Miyagi felt his stomach drop. How would he explain everything to the man standing before him? Surely he couldn't lie, not this late in the game and no without potentially offending Shinobu. His cover had been blown and there was no escape.

"We are dating," It didn't sound as sophisticated as Miyagi wanted, but it was the least offensive thing he could think to say. "I understand what this must be like for you. I was pretty shocked myself when things started out. I thought he was just trying to mess with me, talking about all this destiny stuff-..."

"Maybe I should start at the beginning." He felt like a fish out of water, suffocating and unable to think straight. "Shinobu came to me some time ago and confessed that he liked me, claiming that we were destined to be together. At first I dismissed him, but eventually it turned into this."

"'This'...?" The dean didn't look any more amused than he had before Miyagi's watered down explanation.

"Well yes, I did say we were dating."

"You're aware of the position you're in, correct?"  

"I am." Miyagi's heart sank. Who was he kidding? To think that Shinobu's father might actually accept them, or at least spare sacking him from his job. "As I didn't press charges on Risako, can I ask just one favor?"

"Depends on the favor." Giving Shinobu a sharp look, Miyagi's boss tapped his foot impatiently.

"If I'm going to lose my job anyways, will you at least let me resign quietly?"

"Fine, bring your resignation to my office on Monday and have your office cleared out by the end of it." Grinding his teeth a little, the dean turned his back to the both of them. "We'll have a long talk at that time about my son. As for you Shinobu-..."

A long piercing silence followed and both Shinobu and Miyagi waited for the dean to finish his sentence, but instead he just shook his head.

"Please listen." Speaking as calmly as he could, Shinobu pushed Miyagi's arms away and stood on his own. "I'm old enough to choose what I want to do in life. Old enough to choose who I want to have in my life and who I don't want in my life. Miyagi's my-..."

"I don't want to hear it Shinobu." Raising his voice, the dean slammed his fist into the nearest wall, causing the boy to jump. Shinobu quickly recovered and sharply grabbed onto one of Miyagi's arms, holding it up as if it were on some kind of display.

A small wave of deja vu came over the older man. He couldn't help but remember that not long ago he had done the same thing when visiting his teacher's grave for the last time.

"Look at me!" Bratty as ever, Shinobu jabbed his father in the back until the older man finally turned to scowl at him and at their arms. "I-... I love this guy. He's really important to me. He's old and grumpy and he smokes too much-..."

Old huh... Miyagi couldn't help but hang his head at the thought, tuning back into what Shinobu was saying.

"-and he likes weird books, but I love him." Taking a deep breath to keep his voice steady, the honey-haired boy raised his eyes to meet his father's. "Don't fire him, he's good at what he does. Don't fire him on my account."

Now the dean looked slightly taken-aback, though he didn't comment. Shinobu's head had ducked in the same fashion as Miyagi's. Out of the corner of his eye, the dark-haired man cold see that the kid was crying again, only in a more reserved way.

"I'll see you on Monday." It was the last thing Miyagi's boss uttered before leaving the room. Neither of the two left standing had thought to look up at his face, but his grim voice was enough to tell them that Shinobu's plea had probably failed.

"I'm sorry." Shinobu murmured, making use of the pocket tissues once more. His face was flushed, eyes puffy and red, heat from his fever was coming off him in waves and his hair was tangled and wet from sweating, but somehow, Miyagi thought that Shinobu couldn't have possibly looked any cuter.

"I love you. Thank you for trying." Cupping the boy's face between his hands he brought their faces together and kissed Shinobu for the first time in what had seemed like forever. The kissing grew a little more frantic and it was about that time Miyagi had to remove himself from the smaller's clinging. "W-Wait till we get home at least! You shouldn't even be up, you have to rest when we get home."

"I love you too Miyagi." Sporting an impish grin, Shinobu was showing no signs of obeying. He cheekily walked out of the guest room ahead of Miyagi and started downstairs. The older man shook his head, grumbling under his breath about 'today's youth', before following after him.

---

They arrived back at Miyagi's apartment, neither one having said anything on the ride home. They had, however, held hands. Something neither of them had been able to to for a long time. Just something as simple as that was enough to sustain them until they were safely tucked inside.

"You really never change this place, do you?" Shinobu scanned his eyes around the room, the apartment looked the same way it had when he had left.

"Yeah, well... I think I'm ready for some change." Miyagi too was looking at his apartment, a blank expression on his face. "Why don't we have some tea?" The smaller nodded in agreement, though he didn't really want any. While Miyagi worked in the kitchen he seated himself on the couch, his head throbbing lightly.

"What happened while I was away?"

"Ah, that," The older man spoke as if Shinobu had brought about a specific incident, when really he had just been asking in a general sense. This caused a wave of curiosity to arise, which turned to worry at what Miyagi said next, "We really need to sit down and have a heart to heart about a few things."

"What kind of things?" Immediately his mind went into panic mode. He would have to tell Miyagi everything that had happened with Colin in Australia. He would have to tell him about the kissing and the touching and the sex-...

"I heard from Risako that you met someone while you were away."

"What all did she tell you?! Whatever she said was probably only half true, you know how she likes to distort things. Or at least lately she's been doing that..."

"Just calm down. I'm not trying to pry, I just can't help but wonder if maybe you wouldn't like to be back there with him." Miyagi spoke quietly, almost as if he wasn't speaking to Shinobu at all. As he set two tea cups out on his coffee table, the gray-eyed boy noticed his hands were slightly shaky. "Not that I'm not happy that you came back, but I don't want you to feel obligated to an old man."

Shinobu wanted to yell at the dark-haired man, actually, hit him. Surely he could tell he was saying things that couldn't in a million years be true. His voice had abandoned him and suddenly his mouth felt desert dry. He took one of the cups from the table and downed the hot liquid, scalding his tongue.

"Careful!" Miyagi rushed to the kitchen and grabbed a dishrag, using it to clean up the tea that Shinobu had just spat out all over himself and the couch. "Let it cool down some! Honestly-..."

"You're so friggen stupid!" Still trying to let his taste-bugs recover some, Shinobu snatched the cloth and dabbed at the wet spot on his shirt and pants. "Did you hear what I told my dad?! Or are you getting so old you can't hear right?!"

"OI! Enough with the age thing! I get it, I'm an idiot and I'm old."

"That isn't what I'm saying!" Taken-aback by the lack of confidence the older man was exhibiting, Shinobu pushed himself off the couch and took Miyagi's hands in his. "I want to be here with you, s'why I got on the first flight I could and hightailed it. Why are you freaking out?"

"Sorry." Averting his eyes, Miyagi sat down heavily on his couch, leaving his hands in Shinobu's. "You left so suddenly that I didn't really understand what had happened. I mean, I know I hadn't exactly been around much. I wasn't paying you enough attention, but did that warrant all this?"

"You cheated on me. Remember?"  

"I kissed Kamijou, I admit to that, but I wasn't right in the head that night."

"He was sending you love letters! Something else must have been going on besides just a kiss!" Trying his best to keep calm, the boy shut his eyes and gripped at the warm hands that he was holding. "I read one of the letters. It was in a blue envelope, but I threw it away."

"Wait... Blue envelope?" Miyagi shut his eyes and thought for a long time, trying to recall where in his memory he had seen a blue envelope. "THAT BLUE ENVELOPE?!" Startled, Shinobu shrank back some, his eyes flying open.

"You saw it then?"

"That wasn't for me!" Laughing, almost hysterically, Miyagi pulled his hands back so he could run them back through his hair. "How do I explain this...? Kamijou's seeing some guy he met way back when. That letter was some weird thing he was going to give to that guy. Nowaki, that was his name."

"Oh." Shinobu felt like his body was trying to collapse inside himself. "Then I think I might have made a mistake. I assumed it was for you, so when you told me that you kissed him, I thought you had been cheating on me. I mean, you and him had been going out for drinks a lot at the time."

Blushing from ear to ear, the younger male laid himself back on the couch. He covered his face with his arms, unable to look at Miyagi directly. He could hardly stand all the trouble he had caused, couldn't fully accept that he had made such a big mistake. It seemed more like a dream that something that could have actually happened.

"Shinobu, listen closely. For the last time, there's nothing going on with Hiroki and I. He and I like to play around, well I like to play around, but we both have people we want to be with and that isn't each other." Carefully peeling back Shinobu's arms, the taller man leaned down and pressed his lips to the smaller's. "For me, it's you. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Now. There's something else I need to tell you." Sitting back up, Miyagi cleared his throat a little. He took a couple moments to prepare himself before gently murmuring the words. "While you were away, Risako and I slept together. I know we weren't together at the time, but I didn't want it to be some big secret."

"Oh." The thought didn't appeal to Shinobu at all, but he forced himself to accept that it was while they were broken-up. He also had to reason that he had done the same thing. "I have to tell you something too. Colin, that's the guy I was dating in Australia, at least I think we were dating-... Anyways, he and I also... Uh... S-Slept together."

Miyagi made a face, clearly feeling about the same way. He didn't want to think of anyone else touching Shinobu, but he had to be a mature adult and accept things as they were.

"When you're well again, let's go and look at apartments." It was an odd way for the older man to react, but it certainly caught Shinobu's attention. "I'm tired of living here. I want to go pick out a place for just the two of us. If your dad keeps his promise, I should be able to get work at a different university."

"A place for just the two of us?" Shinobu echoed Miyagi's words, his heart doing some kind of fancy dance inside his chest. "Like, another apartment like this? Two rooms?"

"I was thinking more like one room and maybe a spare office or something-..."

Blinking in amazement at the man before him, Shinobu rose from the couch and crept over to Miyagi, slipping his arms around the man's neck. He placed his legs on either side of the older's body and gently brought the dark-haired head to his chest so that Miyagi could rest there.

"You've really grown up a lot." Miyagi sighed, almost wistfully. Shinobu was certainly getting taller, losing his boyish looks, becoming more defined as a man. His bratty personality wasn't going to go down without a fight, but it was becoming more mellow as well. "Makes me feel ever older."

"I don't care. It just means that I can start taking care of you. It would make me really happy if I could be the kind of man who could do that for you." Running his fingers through Miyagi's hair, Shinobu pulled back enough to place a very light, shy kiss on the professor's forehead. "I'll stay with you, even if your hair turns all gray."

"Even if I go bald?"

"...We could always buy a wig-..."

"OI!" Neither one could resist the temptation to laugh, something neither one had been able to freely do for a long time. "I love you Shinobu."

"Not as much as I love you." It was hardly more than a whisper, because the younger man was reaching his limit on embarrassment. His ears were glowing red and his hands had already started to wring one another. "Miyagi, I want to do it."

"Right now?!"

"Right now." Shinobu began to slip his shirt over his head, only to be stopped by a very flustered Literature Professor. (Technically Ex-Professor.) "I'm already hard."

"I-I can see that, but what about your fever?" Miyagi slipped his hand up under Shinobu's bangs, not wanting to detriment the boy's health, even if it meant waiting on consummating their love.

"That isn't why my body is hot." Looking a little annoyed, the honey-haired boy stood up and continued his discard of his clothes. "I'll be in the bedroom."

"Why all the sudden?! Does house-hunting turn you on that much?"

"When it's with Miyagi, it turns me on." Giving the older man a shy look, Shinobu snuck into the bedroom, leaving the door open just enough to tease.

"Stupid kid." Seeing that it was senseless to try to talk any sense into the boy, as well as to himself, Miyagi rose from the couch and trailed after Shinobu. "Don't blame me when you wake up tomorrow feeling worse."

---

Despite all the time that had passed there was no trace of distance between the two. It didn't matter how badly they had hurt each other,  all of it melted away from the heat between them. They belonged together and it had never been more apparent. Their bodies had clearly remembered what their minds had forgotten.

Shinobu had known all along that there was never anyone for him besides Miyagi. His mind couldn't comprehend how he could have ever strayed away from that one simple fact. How he could have possibly thought that another person could fill the older man's place in his heart, his soul?

Miyagi had also figured out that there was no way he could live without Shinobu. He could ignore his feelings for the younger man as much as he wanted, but they could never be snuffed out completely. The boy in his arms was truly a terrorist, invading his personal space and tearing down his walls.

We belong to one another.